FUN FIRST!

Torching the Gasoline for Explosive Success

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2009

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JULY, 2007

Live your redemption. Focusing on avoiding sin is like living your life with the sole purpose of avoiding being hit by a truck. While it's important not to be hit by a truck and while being hit by a truck could surely be fatal, you won't have much of a life if that's all you think about. You won't enter the street, even to get a toddler out of it or to tell your neighbors their house is on fire, because trucks lurk in the street. Living redeemed means living in power. It's entering the street with confidence because we know God is sending us and accompanies us. Don't be afraid but remember you still have to look both ways.
Love only exists with freedom. Guilt, fear, and self-centeredness are the jailors that imprison us from love. They can make us do a lot of things we fool ourselves into believing are love but are really just the bidding of the jailors.
Tomorrow is Independence Day. In the Declaration of Independence the Founders observed that humans "are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness." You were created to pursue happiness and the Founders thought it was important to the cause of independence to prominently make this point in the Declaration. Of course, you can also choose to pursue unhappiness. The Founders didn't mention this. There's nothing revolutionary about unhappiness.
In the Declaration of Independence, the Founders listed their grievances against King George III. My personal favorite is: "He has erected a multitude of new offices, and sent hither swarms of officers to harass our people, and eat out their substance." We can do this to ourselves. We create all sorts of fears, worries, and concerns that are as useless and destructive to us as a swarm of colonial government officials. Declare your own independence today. Don't let this swarm "eat out your substance" and keep you from exercising your right to pursue happiness.
Fireworks amaze me. What amazes me is the human mind behind them. I cannot begin to understand everything that goes into designing fireworks. How do you put everything together? They have to get lit, fly into the air a prescribed distance, explode with a precise ka-boom, and the pieces have to disperse in a specific pattern, with different pieces burning different colors, which don't set everything on fire when they fall to earth. A work of art made possible by science and engineering. We are amazing creatures. It's important to stop and appreciate that fact. Have fun being amazing today.
I'm 50 years old and I sometimes stop and ask: "How did I get here? How did 50 years pass?" The answer is simple: one day, one moment at a time. Once you grasp that life is lived in the present moment and that you get to choose how you live that moment you are on the road to a happy and effective life. If you think life is what's already happened, or what you hope will happen in the future, you're setting yourself up for disappointment. You can't change the past and the future is largely determined by what you do with each present moment. Life is right now. Make the most of this moment.
A friend recently fell off a ladder. She wasn't permanently injured but she's pretty banged up. Her young children were very helpful and encouraging. In discussing matter-of-factly why it happened one said, "Mommy fell off the ladder because she's fat." Another responded, "No. Mommy didn't fall off the ladder because she's fat. Mommy fell off the ladder because she's old." (She's neither by the way) Better be careful what you say about yourself around little kids. They might take you seriously.
Woke up this morning with a stuffed-up nose. Good thing. One of my dear, beloved dogs had left several nasty deposits throughout the house. It was ok though. Couldn't smell a thing. Something I thought was going to be a handicap turned out to be a strength. Maybe something you think is wrong with you is actually a strength you just haven't figured out how to employ.
One of my dogs is kind of slow-moving most of the time. But one thing makes him exuberant: water. He goes crazy with delight at water spraying from a hose. If you spray him in the face, he's the happiest of all. I don't know how long it takes for him to tire of this because it hasn't happened yet. What's your "water in the face" delight? What can you count on to liven you up and energize you? When's the last time you did it? Why not do it today?
How are your halftime adjustments working? Is the 2nd half of the year off to a good start? Have you re-focused on your goals for the rest of the year? Don't be a slacker! What's the next small step you need to take to reach your goals? Take it now. Write your list of the next five small steps to reaching your goal. Remember, step five is always to make a list of the next five small steps. Each step should be small enough you can accomplish it in a day. Set your goals big but your steps really, really small.
How grateful are you? Are you only grateful when everything is perfect ( meaning never)? Are you grateful when you stub your toe because it reminds you that you 1) are able to walk (though now with a limp), 2) have excellently functioning pain sensors in your toes, and 3) own a lovely coffee table you can unwittingly kick anytime of the day or night while just passing by? Chances are you fit somewhere in between. The goal is to move away from "only when it's perfect" gratitude toward "stubbed toe" gratitude. If you actually get there, you might want to keep it to yourself. Your misunderstanding relatives might take legal action to declare you insane!
It's a beautiful day today. Sunny, warm but not hot, low humidity. I commented on it to the people I ran into this morning. Several gave a "yes, but" response. They noted that it was supposed to be very hot, humid, and unpleasant next week. Why think about future potentially bad weather? "Hi! You really look great!" "Thanks! But you know in 40 years I'll be a feeble dottering old man." It may prove to be true but why poison the present with thoughts of bad things the future may hold? Today is a beautiful day. Enjoy it.
Do you feel completely free? Are you very happy? According to the 2000 General Social Survey people who personally feel complete freedom are three times as likely to say they are very happy than those who say they don't feel free. So, if you aren't happy, ask yourself if you feel like you're not free. If the answer is "yes", ask yourself whether your perceived lack of freedom makes you unhappy or does your unhappiness make you feel like you're not free. Frederick Douglass, in discussing his life as a slave, said that as a child he realized that his masters could not control his mind. At that point, he saw that he was free even though physically he was still enslaved. This realization changed his life dramatically for the better. Chances are any lack of freedom you are feeling comes from imprisoning thought patterns you've stuck yourself with or let somebody else stick you with. Freedom begins with realizing no one controls your thoughts but you and that you can change them.
Today commemorates the storming of the Bastille prison in France in 1789. This marks the beginning of the French Revolution. (This is also my mom's birthday. She enjoyed the fact she was born on the anniversary of a great ruckus!) Storming a prison and releasing the prisoners is a nice image following on yesterday's discussion of freedom. It's a good day to mount an assault on the thought patterns that make you feel un-free. Start your revolution today!
Being redeemed is not like possessing your own personal "Admit One Only" ticket to heaven. If you treat it like a ticket, you'll spend all your time concentrating on trying not to lose it before the appointed time. This is a self-absorbed exercise in fear. Being redeemed is more like irrigating a draught-stricken land. Life giving water saturates and transforms what it touches allowing the land to bloom and bear fruit until evaporation returns the water to the heavens. Look for draught-stricken lives near you and bring them the transforming water of life.
Here are the two steps required to succeed at anything: 1) Start. 2) Don't Quit. It's that simple. Simple but not easy. The fear of starting and the desire to quit after you do start overwhelm most people most of the time because they don't know the two required steps. Now you do.
Fun is the ignitor of success. Yesterday, I said success is a two-step process: 1) Start. 2) Don't Quit. If something looks like its going to be drudgery, you're not likely to start. If it feels like drudgery, you're likely to quit. Fun is what gets you to start and re-fires you when you want to quit. That's why you want to put Fun First in anything you undertake.
"You won't need a telescope." This was the response given by a PhD candidate to an oral examiner's comment that they were just trying to find the boundaries of his knowledge. (While this is a clever response, it dangerously begs the question: "But do we need a microscope!") While a telescope may not be needed to see all that you know, a slow motion camera might come in handy. We think at such a rapid rate that we can lose sight of what we do know. It's good to sit and slowly run through what you know or think you know about a problem you're facing. Taking the time to slow things down will help you see what you know more clearly and see possible solutions as well.
I was tempted this morning to park in the wrong numbered parking space. Since I was the first to arrive I thought of parking one spot over to see if people with assigned spaces adjoining mine would just park next to me or would they actually look for their space number. If everything went smoothly, the last person to arrive would find their co-workers cars all lined up in the proper order but their own parking space mysteriously missing! Sweet! If you'd been the last to arrive, what would your reaction have been? "That's interesting." "These idiots all parked in the wrong spots!" "They gave somebody my spot! Did I get fired?" What's your reaction say about you? Think about it while I go move my car.
Life is like baseball. Even when you strike out, there's still hope: a dropped third strike. If the catcher misses strike three, and you can beat the throw to first base, you're safe even though you struck out. Don't ever quit. Even when all seems lost. Be alert. You might be just a 90-foot dash from success.
Attending a wedding today. Today is a day to enjoy the "for better" part of the vows. But, true love is built in the "for worse" part. This is true in marriage and in all relationships. I remember the people slogging around in my flooded basement carrying stuff out, and the people helping me through my personal traumas more vividly than I remember anybody attending my wedding. So, I guess that the "for worse" part might actually be the "for better" part too.
On our second wedding anniversary, we returned from dinner,opened the door to our apartment, and saw: 1) the vase of roses I'd bought for her sitting on the table; 2) a bat flying from one end of the apartment to the next. I looked at the bat, then at my wife and said: "Well, how do you like it?" She got a good laugh out of that. A sense of humor goes a long way. Especially when wild winged rodents invade your home.
" Once in Los Angeles I met a young actor who was so beautiful I thought ' So, that's what God meant,'" wrote Peggy Noonan in the Wall Street Journal. When I read this I thought "Heather". I wrote this poem inspired by Ms. Noonan's thought for my friend Heather for her birthday. Hope you like it. What He Meant She is a pretty woman.In fact she is the prettiest,that this or any other manhas had the blessing to be witness. Maybe she's a Rembrandt?Or a Michaelangelo?But could even those great mastersmake such beauty? Surely, no. While they could work great wonderswith marble, paint and brush,to call their works "Masterpiece,"compared to her- would make them blush. Confronted with her beautythese "masters" would break downand along with brush and chiselfall prostrate on the ground. "This work is sheer perfection:the eyes, the face, the chin- the exquisitely formed muscles-the flawless smile and skin." "There’s never been such beauty-in my work, your work, or His.He really far out-shined Himself,the pinnacle she is." Because our world is broken-(the fallout of the Fall)everything we see here possesses some apparent flaw. But God in His great goodnesswants us in His love to see,the glory He intendedwhen He first made man and Eve. That's why He gave us Heather,so we'd know what He had in mind.While the rest of us look Fallen,she is God's original design.
Many success gurus will say "Don't hit 'snooze'. Set your alarm early and jump right out of bed." But, my wife is way too cute for that. I wake up and see her and am in no hurry whatsoever to get up and leave her. In fact I set the alarm early just so I can wake up and stay there resetting the snooze a few times. Fun First! says start the day with something you love. I love my wife more than anything. Hopping right out of bed and being "productive" wouldn't work for me. I'd be cheating myself out of the most important thing in my life: savoring the gift of my wife. Why would I rush getting up? It's not like I have anything better to do. Remember, you get to decide what "success" is for you.
"People don't want to act to improve their lives. They want an excuse not to act and they'll pay you a lot of money to give it to them. That's why they'll buy course after course. It's a reason not to act." This is what one guy in the personal development business said to a new guy just starting out. Sad but probably true to some extent. We never feel quite ready to take the plunge and so we create reasons not to move. If you don't start, you won't get anywhere. You can take that to the bank but you won't have anything else to take there unless you get started.
"Start with the end in mind", says Stephen Covey (an equally bald but much more famous motivational guy than I). The idea is to know where you want to end up so you start out going in the right direction, stay on the correct path, and know when you've gotten there. This is good but it's also important to enjoy the journey and be open to an interesting detour or even a change in destination. If you're driving to L.A., you probably want to detour to the Grand Canyon, even though you get to L.A. later than you would have without the stop. You'll be enriched by the experience and may even be motivated to be a ranger rather than a movie star. Be open to changing your plans.
I learned to play the guitar because I wanted to be a rock star and my dad wouldn't let me have a set of drums. I never became a rock star. I did become a music lover though. In pursuing my desire for fame, I discovered that what started out as just the means to my goal of stardom turned out to be a worthy end in itself. I now love music in most of its styles and am in awe of the power to create beautiful music we humans possess. I eventually decided my original goal was not really what I wanted but its pursuit brought me to the point where I found something that contiues to enrich my life (and nobody bothers me for autographs). Be open to other opportunities that arise while pursuing your goals and don't discourage a wannabe rock star. Even if it's you!
This is the anniversary of John Henry's retirement as a race horse. I love John Henry. He was a late bloomer and excelled way past what's normally a thoroughbred's racing prime. He won "Horse of the Year" at age 6 and again at age 9. His parents were not distinguished and there was no obvious reason from looking at him to think he'd do anything noteworthy. But he didn't care about any of that. He just ran and his competitors and opposing jockeys ate the turf churned up from his long, sweet stride. John Henry teaches that age and appearances don't mean a thing.
Marc Allen, in his Millionaire Course, discusses how, while living in a slum apartment, he set as one of the components of the "ideal scene" for his life, owning a large white house on a hill in Marin County, California. A few years later, when he bought that house, as he walked through it he asked himself "Why did I buy this house?" When he'd set it as a goal, it symbolized a particular desired level of financial success for him. He'd changed in the interim but never bothered to adjust his goal. He'd actually been perfectly happy with the house he was living in before buying the "big white house." Success is about who you become not what you own. Material goals are useful because they are concrete and measurable. Just be sure to re-evaluate them often. The person you become might not think they are nearly as important as the person you used to be did.
A friend said, as I headed off to court on my speeding ticket, "Demand justice!" I said, "I'm not interested in justice. I'm looking for mercy!" It's good to be just but mercy is the gold in the "Golden Rule." "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" is about mercy even more than it's about justice. Remember that next time you're ready to lower the boom on someone for their error.
There's one way life is NOT like baseball. Life has no "Slaughter Rule." No matter how bad a beating you're taking in the early innings you don't get to quit early and go home. You have to play it out. You can just go through the motions or you can try to improve the way you're playing. Either way, the game goes on. Just going through the motions does not alleviate the suffering. Improving your play does. And, because life ultimately IS like baseball, we know there's always a chance to win, until the last out is made, no matter how far behind you are.