FUN FIRST!

MONTHS

2010

• January
• February
• March

2009

• January
• February
• March
• April
• May
• June
• July
• August
• September
• October
• November
• December

2008

• January
• February
• March
• April
• May
• June
• July
• August
• September
• October
• November
• December

2007

• January
• February
• March
• April
• May
• June
• July
• August
• September
• October
• November
• December

2006

• October
• November
• December

MARCH, 2010

•  I was a tuxedo model yesterday at a bridal fashion show.  Beauty pervades a bridal show.  The women, the dresses they model, the way their hair is done, the wedding cakes, the presentation of other delectables, the women (oh, I mentioned them already!) are all stunningly beautiful.  All beauty is the result of someone's creative genius.  The dress designers, the pastry chefs, the hairstylists all conceive a beautiful design and execute it to perfection, giving those of us who are paying attention a sensory feast.  Humans can create amazingly wonderful things and we should strive to do so and to appreciate the beauty others create.  Creativity is a reflection of the Divine in us.  After all, God is the ultimate creative genius.  God made the women.  
•  How to feel better in less than a minute: 1) Pick something you're grateful for.  Spouse, kids, the joy of a baby playing peek-a-boo, the taste of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.  It can be anything.  2) Close your eyes and get a clear picture of it in your mind.  Imagine it.  Imagine yourself experiencing the pleasure associated with it. Imagine how it engages each of your senses. What are its sounds, smells, tastes, and feel?  Bask in the joy of it.--- That's it.  Less than a minute to a gratitude induced attitude improvement.  Give it a try.
• When I worked in a restaurant, I observed two types of coffeemaking catastrophes: 1) starting to brew but forgetting to put the pot in place to receive the brewed coffee; 2) putting the empty pot in place on the hot burner but forgetting to push the start button.  The first causes freshly brewed coffee to flow onto the burner, the counter and the floor-- wasting the coffee and making a mess.  The second causes the empty pot to overheat until it shatters-- leaving pieces of glass strewn all over.  This is a nice metaphor for relating to people.  If the pot's not ready to receive, don't start gushing "wisdom".  If the pot's ready, don't wait.  How do you know?  You have to pay attention to the pot.  The restaurant coffeemaking catastrophes occurred because the person making the coffee was thinking about their own problems-- what they had to do next, customers complaining about the food, something annoying about their co-workers-- and lost track of the pot.  For any relationship to flourish, you have to keep attuned to the other person's mental, emotional, and physical condition and act in accordance with what you see.  
•  Here's a multiple choice question to answer about your life: My life is: a) an action-adventure; b) a situation comedy; c) an intense drama; d) a tragedy; e) one of those "art" films where you can never figure out the point and nothing much ever happens and all of the characters are dull and lifeless.  What did you pick?  Do you like the answer?  The great thing about life is that you don't have to perform according to a set script.  Life is more like improv.  Every day comes along with a new opportunity to take the same situation and turn it into a completely different story.  In improv, you take what's presented to you and (generally) make something fun out of it.  That's not a bad plan for life either. 
•  You might say "Mark, it's great you find so much joy in other people but frankly I don't like people that much.  They're mostly a big disappointment to me.  I find them a source of pain not joy."  I can relate. It may surprise you but for a long time I never really liked people either.  I spent a lot of time being critical.  I thought life would be so much better if people would just change.  Eventually, I realized this approach was making me unhappy and that, like the weather, people are what they are.  No amount of whining was going to change them.  I just had to adapt.  So, I decided I wasn't going to let what was wrong with other people bother me.  I did two things to accomplish this: 1) realized I was responsible for my own happiness and didn't need anyone to act in any particular way to make me happy; 2) quit thinking about what was wrong with people and started looking for what was good about them instead.  It worked.  It took some effort to catch my old thought patterns and change them but in a short period of time I'd become a happy person. 
•  Ran into an acquaintance at a coffee shop.  She said she hadn't been there in a long time.  Her driver-side window was broken so she couldn't go to any drive-ups and it was too cold to get out and walk-in.  She said it worked out well though-- she saved money and lost a few pounds.  I told her she should market it as "The Broken Window Diet and Financial Recovery Plan."  Personally, I use the "Way Too Lazy Diet."  While I would eat a dozen chocolate chip cookies, if they were placed in front of me, I'm way too lazy to make chocolate chip cookies or even go on any kind of search to find them.  I use the vice of laziness to offset the vice of no self-control.  Maybe it's actually "The Make Your Vices Work For You Diet."  I should give this some thought.  There may be a book in it.
•  I spent yesterday afternoon with a young man from China who is here attending college.  At one point, he said "I have no idea what just happened" and I realized I had no way to explain it.  The lack of a common language is an obstacle.  This is true even if both people speak English.  Our different life experiences make the same words or actions mean different things to different people.  [If you don't believe this, that means you've never been married!!]  That's why it's important,when you have an "I have no idea what just happened [or why you just said that or why you just did that]" experience with somebody, not to jump to the conclusion their motivation was bad.  It's good to give people the benefit of the doubt until you know enough about them to make an accurate assessment of what they are up to. 
•  I'm in a fog this morning.  Not the usual metaphorical morning fog in my sleepy little head, but a real fog outside my window.  When it's foggy, you have to slow down because you can't see more than a few feet in front of you.  While this is unnerving, it does help you focus on your next step because you don't really have any choice.  It's a good reminder that no matter where we're going, we only get there by taking the next step.  We don't need to know what future steps will lead us to achiveing our goals, we just need to take the step that lies right in front of us.  Each step we take leads us to the next.  You can only see tomorrow's step after you've taken today's.
•  A big advantage of hands-free cell phone technology is that you can now walk down the street talking to yourself and people just think you're on the phone instead of thinking you're schizophrenic.  This opens up some great opportunities for self-entertainment while walking. [Like saying as someone approaches: "You mean somebody can catch this from me just by passing me on the street," then quickly looking at the passerby, gasping, and running to the other side of the street.]  We all talk to ourselves.  The problem is what we say is usually negative.  We have a choice.  We can talk ourselves into success or failure, joy or despair, action or inaction.  The most important conversations we have every day are the ones we have with ourselves.  We need to make those conversations productive and upbuilding.  What have you been talking to yourself about so far today?  Have you been encouraging or derogatory?  Maybe it's time to change the tone of the conversation. Give yourself a break.
•  "We are what we repeatedly do.  Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit." (Aristotle)  And, a habit of excellence starts with an act.  Unless you want to excel at procrastination, you have to actually do something to succeed.  The best way to begin a habit of excellence is to start doing things that are easy.  Take small steps that move you toward mastery.  If you want to be in excellent physical shape, start small.  Maybe walk around your car before you get in it to drive somewhere.  That's pretty easy and it has the added advantage of making people who see you wonder what you're doing.  If you really want to have fun, when you're walking in a public parking lot you can look intently at a random parked car, squat down while continuing to look at the car, stand up, shrug your shoulders, and walk on.  Anything to start a pattern of more physical activity and maybe give yourself a laugh at the same time.